Being An Engineer.

Posted by - Rohit

Being a part of a South Indian Middle class family one has to witness strict norms that need strict adherence. For instance there should be at least one Engineer or Doctor within the family. You are considered a rebel if you turn out to become an Architect or considered possesed if you even think of a career in the Media.
So, I am not indifferent to such protocols and its repercussions if they aren't followed. So here I'm, an Engineer.

All said and done, becoming an Engineer is not easy and it's not the course curriculum that makes it difficult but the rules that one needs to adopt are tougher than most of the brotherhoods or secret societies. So, all these ivy league high-browed walls, with their alpha-beta-gamma sects here's an in your face fact of supremacy about us Engineers.
So what does it be an Engineer.

1. ATKTs
Right from the day you kick the 'lotta' of rice while entering the institution you should know that KTs are there to stay. What it means is that you are Allowed To Keep Term, but even the dictionary has an alternate meaning for it. KTs define a person, his character, his resilience and doens't make him forget that he is mere human.  Friendship is directly proportional to the number of KTs one has. For instance, I had three KTs and my best friend had five. A good engineer has no KTs, but a better engineer has some while the best manufactured engineering products talk in terms of Year Drops.

2. Bulk Clearance.
A good engineer always clears more than 6 papers at a time. It defines the amount of pressure one can handle. This defines one's multiprocessing ability in the long run it makes you a better husband as constant nagging and constant whining are filtered as those back logs are percieved as the bird's eye that needs to be targetted. One of my senior in college cleared 18 at a time. Rumour has it a girl tatooed his name on her back.

3: '40'...The Forty.
That's your dream, the sole purpose of being an engineering student. A true engineering student would know the thrill of gaining that golden figure. Tears, thrill, exhilleration, illumination, alleviated consternation, disentangled convolution and finally free from constipation. A true engineering student should at least get 40 in three subjects, if you get more than them understand that, this is what you were born for. If your friend doesn't get that golden figure in any of the subject, unfriend, now. He/she is up to something secretive.

4: 'Copy' Writing.
You are never meant to write assignments of your own, doing so, you would be termed as 'Dedh Shaana' and would be boycotted from the raw engineers sect. Always copy your assignments from the 'not-meant-to-be-engineers' class. An average engineer's writing speed is 800-1000 words per minute and it's only because one writes all those assignments in bulk just a day prior to the final submission. The record for top writing speed has been 1247 words per minute held by one of my seniors. Rumour has it the same girl I had previously mentioned about tatooed his name on her forearm.

Nail it Brothers

5. Understand encoded english.
The teachers belonging to engineering colleges speak in a language that doesn't sound like english, but is english. An engineering student tries very very hard to make some sense out of the lines which has some english words brilliantly mixed with regional diction. Reciprocate without hurting their sentiments. That's an exercise in itself to tackle goverment servants.

6: They are professors, yes they are.
Engineering professors are nothing but passouts from the rural college of whatever. They are at the most only a couple of years older to you. You would most of the time be tempted to call them Bhaiyya or Didi. Restrain yourself. Understand they are professors. A true engineering student would never retailiate towards ineffective teaching by even ineffective teachers having no effective knowledge as this self restrainment would help them achieve better relations with potentially hateful bosses.

7: Give it up for the...Orchestra!
Yes, Engineering students face the worst Cultural festival ever. A promised Rockband goes through heavy metamorphosis in the last minute to become an Orchestra. Alka Yagnik, Kumar Sanu, Udit Narayan you are our heroes. In our first year the DJ played "Kaala kauva".In the second year he played "Kaala Kauva", in third year he again played "Kaala Kauva" finally in the final year he played "Kaala Kauva Remix". One of my seniors was headbanging on Bappi Da's  "You are my chicken fry". And the girl I was talking about is rumoured to have a his named tatooed on her shoulder.
Now you probably know why we can still watch RaOne in 3D and not complain about it.

8: Study but...
Watch something like Bedroom Partner (a movie) just a day before the exam and then start studying...together. Every engineer does. 40 is all you want, then why would you ever want to waste time, that can be converted to moments, just by studying something that was obselete a century back. Emphasize on this: Study just a day before.

They are not just protocols but a test that can deem us as really low profile demi-gods.
Bohemians, mavericks, diplomats, outcasts, social misfits and 100% original, we the raw ones are the true ones. So respect me as soon as I say, I'm an Engineer.

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  1. A very true fact about being engineer...
    Every word is so true... :)

    +1 for this statement: "Study just a day before"

  2. RESPECT.... Went through all the above phases. Nostalgic :-)

  3. I can relate to this story, I suppose everyone can ;-)

  4. That reminded me some of the unforgettable days in my life.. The College Days.. :)

  5. I also chose to be an Engineer, since I knew that being a doctor was certainly going turn to out to be far more tougher!
    Of course I certainly never went on to become a full time engineer also.
    But having read this piece was a journey in the time machine 40/45 yaers back.
    And also a small realization that the life as engineer, to the extent I was one, was certainly interesting, to say the least.

    1. haha...what makes me think now is, the situation and syllabus of engineering colleges seem the same as it was 40 years back, haha!
      Glad you liked it :)

  6. Good one dude..!!

    My view to point 5. also adds below :

    Engineering text and professors may many a times sound, read and make you believe that you are reading some legal agreement, a copy of some deal which has so much written and very less to understand and may have at least 10 more points added as exception to bound you with some rule and follow that strictly.

    Inshort it felt that I was just forced to understand all confusing and related statements which one could not understand unless you get Job to really make sense of it.

    Engineer Rocks! :P

    - Keyur

  7. seriously reading ur posts now..........

    thanks for inspiring me to write again................

  8. Every word of this seems true for me (2003-2007) - my life @ COE...!

  9. Superliked. Been there, ... done that & experienced all the stuff you've discussed. It's like reading my feelings & experiences on somebody else' page. Good work, keep it up.